There's a fascinating thing involved in the basic male-female attraction and as most people like to refer to it as some sort of connection; I chose to call it chemistry which is infact the basics of any kind of reaction between 2 separate entities.
Now, I've seen a lot of awful breakup and heartbreak episodes from both male and female friends and its high time I address this issue...it all comes forth in a single statement. 'There are lot of guys in the world; so why do majority of the female population get attracted to the bad boys?'
I'm certain we all understand the various kind of guys that fall under this platform: these range from the milder kinds who are the typical playboys that change partners like some people do accessories, the mischievous kinds who enjoy going past the limits, taking odd risks and seeking out danger to the hardened type who actually break laws and have criminal affliction in terms of drug abuse, violent acts,e.t.c. Bad guys, rakes or rogues as they are called seem to have better luck with the females more than the nice guys who tend to remain in the friendship department.
I try hard not to judge or assume, afterall almost everyone wants their love story to stand out and be as fairytale-like as possible and i'm no exception.Now, its almost a well known philosophy that girls date bad guys and marrry nice ones mostly cuz the bad ones are not marriage-oriented. That leaves the nice/good guys out of the dating scenes hence practically next to no experience till they get the heart wrecked gal who wants to settle for them. Sucks when kept that way doesnt it? Some girls even already have the loving and caring nice guy at their beck and call, yet throw it all outta the door for a little piece of adventure.
Still, after series of over-extended heartbreak episodes similar causes, why is it still hard to figure out the factors that leaves the good guys single most of the time while the girls seem bent on hopping from one hurt-avenue to another?
Also, what are the cause of this so-called attraction that is spiked up by the dangerous ones. it cant possible be cause the nice ones are unlucky in love or we girls just love the drama that comes wiv getting our emotions trampled on over and over again.
So, below are my thoughts on the reason we've got most of the girls especially the good ones leaping from one scoundrel to another;
From the Roots:
In every teenage girl's life is a rebellion phase in which all she wants to do is go against her parents or elderly one's wish... I'm not certain but i like to link this up wit all the pent-up frustration of being Daddy's or mum's little angel... So when Its time to get a date to the prom, she won't aim for the nerdy or respectful boy that lives nearby as her parent want, instead all attention seem to be on the most popular kid in school which is rarely the smartest kid in school...nah!!
Those sorta kids are always the star athletes, the one wiv the singing or dancing clique, the one who seem indifferent to all school rules and could care less about the rights of τ̅ђε world.. There seem to be something compelling about the attention given to such guys cuz they tend to find their ways into female's minds, it might appear mere buh this could be connected wiv women's constant need to be the center of attention, to buy flashy accessories to get noticed and envied by their peers.. Being wiv the popular kid 'll definitely get any kid noticed. The knowledge that the guy could probably get his pick outta all girls even makes the feeling more special, just like the crowning a deserving princess from any fairytale.
Gradually:
Now, there are those girls who never enjoyed the thrill of being a rebel, but they are definitely likely to move to college when its due time. Talk about freedom to do as you please! This is a straight ticket to getting a taste of life in an unrestricted form. They simply want to experience everything they've been missing out on since birth especially some from religion/beliefs-rigid homes.
As expected, the experience they seek wouldn't be the good sort, nah!! It'll be the partying, drinking and letting loose sorta fun which'll more likely get 'em to meet more of the bad eggs/guys. And compared to those, the nice ones are boring and lifeless and they definitely stand no chance.
Tick Tock!!
Excitement and Intrigue: This is my personal favourite, there's a lot of heart racing and adrenaline pumping through one's veins when there's a risk to be taken... And everything about being with or dating a confirmed rake screams Risk. I can just imagine all the danger sirens going off in one's head and that either scares a lady off or gets her excited .... This will be called the *shiver through my spin, heart skipping, weak knees* sorta concept.
Being mischievous, naughty, unpredictable and shocking keeps a girl seeking for more. Its simple to understand.... its an adrenaline rush just like any addictive drug and like any addiction, stopping is the hard part. The hurts and pain involved becomes a cycle of cherished feeling!
Romantics...
Now, the most dramatic will be those ladies that are convinced that the typical *innocent girl meets scoundrel, they fell in love and the love changed him* sequence. Firstly, i can't over-emphasise how pathetic that sounds, the world is filled with already changed men, why bother repairing a broken one when you can get a new one?
Besides, not everyone is suffering from pains of their childhood or being too hurt by former partners. Those lines are already a textbook statement by the way, everybody knows 'em and can use it. So, Fixing a broken soul shouldnt really be a set criteria in finding 'the one'. Its good to be good but its just plain dumb to let someone make a fool out of you while you're at it.
A good percentile of guys adapt to the behaviour for no reason at all, hence no one can fix something that was not broken in the first place.
At the end of the day...
In every couple, there's the reacher and the settler... Its a well known philosophy, there'd be one of 'em who settled for someone less than deserving(reacher) and there'd be the one who aimed(reacher) higher than he/she deserves.
So, often more than less, ladies prefer to be the reacher in a relationship, it doesn't seem befitting or encouraging for them to settle for someone below their social,or financial status. And majority of the nice guys whether of the same social standing or not, potray an outlook of being less because all the nice and gentlemanly conducts, chasing after them and doting on them gets written off as kissing up or begging for attention.
This persona portrays them to be less confident and less attractive in female's subconscious. This has proven to be a major turn-off to girls. Because they tend to get drawn to males who call attention to themselves without speaking, who take what they want without asking much less begging, this is regarded as confidence (although most time its pure arrogance),who behave indifferent, superior, cocky, the list goes on to “bad” behavior.
Its a common knowledge that alluring/inviting and intoxicating personalties - often perceived as playfulness, sexuality and fun is what makes them ruthless in the first place.
Well, This is basically what attract ladies, it'll be too hard not to have a slight crush (hate or love, people have different ways of dealing with attractions) on someone who potrays all their qualities.
They are exciting and intriguing, and seeking out a little adventure to spice up life is a welcomed change.
Still, does that mean a regular everyday- nice guy who could give you more security can't also up his game and pep up his acts to get you intrigued?
Because no matter how charming and thrilling a bad guy is, still leaves enough room for doubts and insecurity which is never good for a relationship.
Regardless, the ultimate attraction between a girl and a bad guy is basically inevitable...so,i think the only change is for the good/nice guys; Get off your nice-zone and spice up your acts, not so you'll become complete jerks buh enough to get a girl convinced that You can love her and also rock her world @ the same time.
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Placer y el Dolor
Hmmm... Lovely and very true! lol...The 1st 2 applies to me tho. Kip it up sis!
ReplyDeleteYour points are factually uncontentious and largely right.......but you equally have to bear in mind that, there are as many bad guys as there are bad girls. Its not a gender thing, its more of individual's belief.
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